These 11 Kids Wrote Hilarious Things About Dogs

Written by: Laura Hartle

March 25, 2014

We’ll say this for tiny hoomans…they say what they mean and mean what they say. And that is especially true when it comes to one of their favorite subjects: Dogs!

Note: These may be written by tiny humans, but many of them are not FOR tiny humans!

1. Your limits of “reality” will not rein in their dreams!

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2. But at the same time, they are not afraid to get real and deliver the stone-cold facts when the situation calls for it: “September 1, 2010. I have a new dog. Its name is Taco. It is a boy.”

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3. They are NOT into consolation prizes.

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4. They ain’t too proud to beg! (Or draw detailed diagrams. Seriously, Santa, pay attention.)

“Hi Santa it is me Porter my sister Claire would rely like a dog. If you could we would rely want a Shih Tzu baby if you look at the top here’s a picher of a Shih Tzu and pless pless pless pless make it a gerl. And if we get a dog we would be happyer thin ever if we don’t we would be sad – but stell like you!”
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5. Santa, Santa…You know bunnies are boring, I know bunnies are boring. Let’s call a spade a spade.

“Dear Santa, I can’t wait for Christmas Eve. Are you getting your elves in action? I guess your whales, penguins, and polar bears are getting along. This Christmas can you give me what I really really want? I would like a dog. I want a dog because having a bunny is so boring. I deserve a dog because I have got good grades in school. Second, I would like power to talk to animals because I love them. I deserve it because I have took good care of them. See you! Love, Nitya”

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6. They know revenge is a dish best served, um, warm?

“When I was eight years old, my neighbour’s dog kept pooping on my yard. So one day I pooped on his yard.”

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7. Yep, that is what’s happening, tiny hooman. You nailed it. No need to belabor the subject.

“Once their was a dog and a nother dog. They are playing.”

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8. Dogs may be man’s best friend…but they are a kid’s best business partner.

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9. Even if they are terrible homework partners. At least one of them got an A.”

“Dear Mrs. Smith, Mel ate my homework.”

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10. Ok, we need to have a chat about how to spell the word cute.

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11. But what can we say? When they are right, they are SO right.

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Featured Image via @Meli_sauso Instagram

Written by: Laura Hartle

March 25, 2014

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A themed collection of BARK-designed toys, treats, and chews.


A themed collection of BARK-designed toys, treats, and chews.