As pop culture today is filled with musings on apocalypses (some zombie, some not), and the endless speculations that accompany such musings descend like a swarm of killer bees (not that I hate useless scenarios or anything, or the addicting quizzes that come with it, or the pointless debates, or the crappy movies that come out of this trend…ok, I’ll stop now), it made us think, as we compiled listicles on doges and hoomans, about the many things dogs give to us and the world.
Since I did a total Henry James on that sentence, without any more rambling and weird sentence structure, here are 27 beautiful, derpy and just plain weird things dogs have given to the world.
1. Great gifs
What would every workday be without these?
The only ones who don’t appreciate this are possibly the dogs themselves.
4. The Doge meme
Tumblr without this = sadness much would.
5. Freudian analysis
Freud would often use his beloved Chow Jofi to help him determine a patient’s mental state. His pup would also always unerringly let him know when his 50 minute sessions were up by heading to the door.
6. Green innovation
A poop machine that creates energy. A recycling program that also helps strays. They’re doing more for the planet than most hoomans do.
7. Interesting erm…fashion choices
It’s a trend for pups to donate hair to their hoomans to give them fashionable warmth. We didn’t make this up.
ALL THE FEELS!!!
Where would early man have been without his faithful companion helping him feed the family?
10. Nanny skills
Some pups could teach Mary Poppins a trick or two.
11. Nome, Alaska
Balto and his heroic canine comrades were able to get much needed medicine to the town in time, saving lives and an entire community from being devastated by disease.
12. Cancer detection
They can smell it with their sniffers, and in doing so, are helping science and early detection rates.
Look, even the Duchess of Cambridge has a guardian pup. AND he’s Irish. #InRuv
14. Getting out of bed
When they gotta go, they gotta go. Or eat. Or play. Hey, they just love us THAT much.
15. Florence Nightingale’s career as a nurse
Nightingale was responsible for revolutionary hospital reform. How did she get her beginning in the healing arts? By helping to save a sheepdog’s paw.
16. Safe landings for planes
Dogs literally help keep runways clear of birds, allowing planes to land without aviary accidents.
After a campaign funds scandal, Nixon’s dog Checkers was a key figure in a 1952 speech addressing the accusations. This was BEFORE Watergate. The speech basically saved Nixon’s butt. He stayed in politics, which paved the way for his presidency (and his infamous leave from it).
18. Rin Tin Tin and Warner Bros.
Warner Bros was just a fledgling studio when they greenlit the first Rin Tin Tin film. It, and its following movies were a hit, creating a doge icon and a powerhouse movie business.
Marmaduke. Snoopy. Corg Life. The list goes on and on.
20. College Mascots in the U.S.
The first college mascot in the United States? Yale University’s Handsome Dan, a bulldog.
21. Emotional stability
The reason why we go ga-ga over cute pups (also known as “cute aggression”) is biological. It helps to balance positive emotions in the brain.
22. Ridiculous puns
23. Viral videos
YouTube would be a forlorn, tiny, ne’er visited little website without the contribution of pups.
Why would you need a blanket or space heater when there’s a willing doge ready to snuggle up and squish you with warm, fuzzy love? Besides, breathing is overrated.
25. Designer poop bags
They’re a thing.
26. This Beatles song
Paul McCartney wrote Martha, My Dear about none other than his Old English Sheepdog.
27. Best friends
Because we wouldn’t be who we are today, as a species or as individuals, without our beloved pups.
What else belongs on the list? Let us know in the comments!