I write from a dog’s perspective so frequently that I feel like I know my alternate universe dog self pretty darn well. Human Thea and Imagined Dog Thea have a cosmic symbiosis, if you will. Now, if there’s one thing I would hate more than anything as a dog, it’s the fact that I have to be subjected to baths, while those catholes don’t.

And yes, I know they technically “clean themselves”, but dogs have more important things to do! Also, spit cannot be that sanitary. Cats must need baths after their done “bathing”.

Thankfully, this dog decided to take matters into his own paws. He was all:

And we were all:

Watch the full, full-of-anticipation, video here:

Way to go, buddy. We paw-lute you.