The Secret Reasons Why Humans Should Be Allowed in Dog Beds

This post is by Hammer the beagle, dictated to her popz, Brendan.  
My dog bed is the perfect sanctuary for sleep, play, and nibbles. 36_DogBed It’s a great place for me to store my chew toys, especially the ones I receive monthly from BarkBox. 51_DogBed It provides an idyllic ground to chew antlers… 55_DogBed Shoot laser beams… 29_DogBed And to pose for photo shoots… 54_DogBed It’s even an ideal spot to hide bones… 47_DogBed Even the fake ones… 53_DogBed So, should you let your hooman sleep with you? 19_DogBed Yes. You should. Why? 48_DogBed Because hoomans make perfect cuddle buddies. 22_DogBed I won’t lie. There are risks. But I’m a gambler by nature. 49_DogBed But before you invite your hooman into bed, set some ground rules. 41_DogBed Even inflatable beds.04_DogBed Cots too! 06_DogBed Train them to be a part of your pack. 10_DogBed Health benefits abound… 11_DogBed It’s a well-known fact that I make hoomans live longer and boost your immune system.14_DogBed If your hooman has as anxious disposition as mine does, I make him feel more calm and less nervous during snuggle sessions.25_DogBed Because my bed is a playground, I keep my hoomans active by playing tug-of-war, or napping. 28_DogBed If your hooman is an insomniac like mine is, I keep him company during an endless night.31_DogBed By petting me, my hoomans feel less isolated, lonely. It’s all about touch.41_DogBed Contrary to popular belief, hoomans do not disturb our quality of sleep, but improve it. For instance, I hide my hooman’s snores with my own. 12_DogBed Anytime my hoomans are manic, which is often, I invite them into bed to snuggle. They settle right away. 20_DogBed My human can be a bundle of nerves. By sharing my bed, I boost his confidence and help him cope with daily functions like going for a walk in the neighborhood and meeting strangers. 35_DogBed Contrary to popular belief, hoomans are more than willing to share blankets. 27_DogBed Contrary to false media reports, I do not divide hooman couples, but, rather, bring them together. 38_DogBed Sure. My hooman rolls over, twitches, and chases money in his sleep. But that’s a small price to pay. 42_DogBed Hoomans love to watch TV in bed. My hooman, like me, loves Boardwalk Empire. 02_DogBed Finally, we make each other feel better about life! 30_DogBed

Hope Bobbitt

8 years ago

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