You ever have one of those moments where you're hanging out with a BiPetual friend (that is, a dog AND cat lover) and you just can't help but put your paw in your mouth? You think you're getting along, then you accidentally toss in a "dogs rule, cats drool" remark, and they look at you like you just pooped in their litter box? Maybe you need a quick refresher of all the things you should never
say to a kitty-loving dog lover. Because you can never be too careful around certain fur-brained friends…
1. "Man, it must be awkward that they both know who your favorite is…"
2. "It's no surprise they get along great! A dog can put up with ANYONE."
3. "Okay, I know you told me to stop asking this, but tell me THE TRUTH: if you could only save one, you'd obviously pick the dog, right?? Just say it!"
4. "Is it weird that one of your pets just kinda ignores everything you say?"
5. "It must be such a relief to actually play with your dog, after lying around with your boring cat on your lap all afternoon."
6. "I feel bad for your dog! You got him such a lazy best friend. I bet your cat is always like, 'I'm definitely leaving this couch… NEXT life.'"
7. "Man, your dog is probably more fun than your cat, like, even when they're pooping. Your dog's like, 'Let's get some fresh air and sunshine!' And with your cat it's, 'Time for you to scoop out my dirt toilet.'"
8. "Do your friends know you have a cat? Because I bet your dog is super friendly and cool when people come over. Your cat probably just waits for everyone to leave."
9. "You have a Shih Tzu!! That's adorable. It's kinda like your cat, but without the garbage attitude."
10. "Aw, I bet it's cute when you come home after a while and your dog jumps up and kisses you. Your cat is… I actually don't know. Where does your cat go? Does she even notice you're gone?"
11. "I bet it's totally like Garfield and Odie in your house. You know, how the dog is super fun and cute, and the cat does nothing and doesn't like anybody."
12. "Thank goodness you have a dog! Imagine if a robber came. Your dog would chase him right off, and your cat would shrug: 'Hey are you done yet? Jewelry's in that drawer. I'm going back to bed.'"
13. "A dog is like an awesome, adorable kid, but cheaper. Why did you even get a cat? A cat's like a creepy Craigslist roommate, but more expensive."
14."You should totally take your dog out to meet my friend's kids, they would LOVE her! And your cat can, uh… well, I wouldn't want him to scratch anyone."
15. "Cat breath? YUCK! Don't get me started!! …No, dog breath is not the same. Dog breath is cute."
Featured image via monjy1015